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Dm’ing: How To

Lately I’ve been receiving lots of messages on both my Facebook and instagram. That’s not a bad thing. The bad thing is reading the messages and wondering why it was sent in the first place.

Guys, you only have one time to make a good first impression and you somehow think sending a dick pic is the impression you want to go with? It’s not even just inappropriate pictures, sometimes I wonder if any thought process was involved.

Here are a few tips on sliding into dms like a pro;

Don’t send dick pics. At least not to me because I’ll reply with a better looking dick, a photogenic dick, a dick with prospects. Yeah and watch out for porn hub & brazzers.com watermark before you try cat fishing.

Just flow, stop over thinking it’s not an exam. If you’re funny, better. Crack some jokes, relax.

Especially if it’s on Facebook and the person’s name is written, please don’t ask what her name is. This happened to me and it was irritating and the guy was fine o. I think it pained me more because he was fine.

After you get a reply to the first “hello” and “how was your day”, follow it up with a brief introduction, little detail about yourself and why the chat is happening. For example “I’m Hope, a blogger and fashion enthusiast and I think your profile is amazing ” or “I read your post on __ and that’s an angle I’ve never thought of”, you know, work your way in with compliments (not effusive flattery). Not “hi, how are you, how was your day, how was work, how is your health” following each other, how about you leave me alone?

Don’t hello baby me. This one is personal. Mandem that go “hey baby”, I know who my daddies are!

Don’t be thirsty. You really need to stop sending how was your day messages if you didn’t get a reply from Sunday to Thursday. She doesn’t care bruh, move on or at the very least hold off for a while.

If you’re not ready for any responsibility that arises from asking her if she has eaten, don’t ask. There are other ways to make conversation. I’ve been asked this once, I replied in the negative and I got “Go and eat na” as a response. I asked him why he asked if he wasn’t ready to do anything about it and he said he was just making conversation. Wawu.

If you’re chatting and the energy feels great and all, ask for a number to call her on.

Before sending that message, especially on Facebook ask yourself if you would be embarrassed if she decides to post a screen shot and advice yourself.

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6 thoughts on “Dm’ing: How To

  1. Hey babyyy 😬

    The brief introduction part did put someone off, in her defence, I was showing off. I believe this whole thing is subjective, best to find something the other person is interested in and develop a conversation on it (works every time).

    P.S. IMs are stressful. Don’t slide into any DM altogether.

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  2. Firstly, i had to go to ma facebook and twitter to see why have not been gettin replies, and lo and behold am very guilty of this “HOW’s YOUR DAY” question and “HEY BABY” palaver.and I guess i did improve on this aspect with the little tips gotten. i got ma game on now. heheheh

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  3. Hello baby
    How are you?.
    Did you go to work? If yes how was it?
    Are you single?
    I’ll like to know you
    Tell me about you
    What’s your name?
    Are you a girl?
    Are you even human?
    Sigh!!!

    Like

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