Are Exes fair game or Are You Just A Mad Person?

This was meant to be a post on girl code.

Yesterday, after hitting the publish button on this post, I had plans of taking on girl code next. Girl code means a set of codes girls must abide by in dealing with fellow girls or risk being kicked out of the community. It sounds grave I know but that’s only because it is a serious issue. I had a list (I promise to post it after this) that I wanted to add to, so naturally, I sought the help of ladies at my workplace. Weirdly, they didn’t know exactly what I was referring to so I had to explain by citing an example. ”Exes of friends are off limits”

That’s how it started.

I believe whole heartedly that your friends’ ex cannot be the person you end up dating or ”gasps” marry. Like how? In this world of over 7 billion people how is it possible that your happiness lies in your friends’ ex??? How? I already said a while back  that I don’t believe in soulmates so it’s a perplexing situation. Up until yesterday, I thought everyone knew this.

One lady was insistent on the argument that exes are fair game as long as your friend has moved on from him. Quick question though, do we really ever fully move on from a relationship? I know about being totally done with someone and holding out no hope for future relations but does not mean I won’t mind my ex dating my friend? Lawd, just the thought of it sef  is getting me all riled up. She said I was being selfish and that I should also take the happiness of the other parties into consideration, lol, again How?? I don’t even care about the happiness of exes. It’s not something I ever ponder on. You can read here to know more about my feelings towards exes.

Imagine having a best friend that was there when you met baby boy, she helped you pick out date outfits from date one till when you got comfortable enough to appear in your natural form before him. She was there through all the fights and apology gifts, helping you compose text messages and what not. And then the relationship ends because, maybe he cheated or you cheated or his family didn’t like you or you realized you’re not really compatible and months later you find out your friend and ex-babyboy are a couple. Please tell me you won’t be mad .

There’s no rationalizing this.

But it’s been so long” . Yet, in all that time you couldn’t get yourself another person’s ex. why mine?

”But you already have a new man” How’s that your business?

”But I really like him” don’t worry, its a phase that will pass.


”But… just shut up.

off limits

Exes are off limits for me. A friends’ ex sha o. Any other ex is ”gettable”

How about you. Would you date a friends’ ex? Would you mind if a friend dated your ex? Let’s talk.






7 Replies to “Are Exes fair game or Are You Just A Mad Person?”

  1. I actually dated one of my best friend ex, I find it awkward at first. So i had to consult some friends about the issue. They told me its nuttin that once we love ourself. No Big deal. I told my friend that i would love to date his ex, and he was cool with it, he said, he would have been mad if only we dint inform him before starting… Thats how we started ooo. Buh at the long run, we started having issues which is normal in a relationship, then her friends start telling her, what was she expecting before, when she was dating her ex friend (reason why i hated 3rd party in ma relationships).. We not together anymore and i actually regretted the move. I feel bad whenever i remember that she was ma friend ex, We actually had good times tho. So EX game is a no no henceforth….


  2. You this babe sha… @olliealley
    Well, it depends on your definition of friendship.
    I might know you, live within the same vicinity, attend the same school , work in the same environment, gist together sometimes or even always with someone… that doesn’t really make us friends. In my head, we are just acquainted to each other. So if you have an Ex (as in real ex and no strings attached) that suits my criteria for being my man, then he will gladly be mine.
    After all, 95% of the people one ends up meeting happens to be someone else’ EX. So if you get caught up with an ex of a friend or better put an acquaint… #LiveHappy!

    P.s.: Please feel free to date my Ex and even invite me to come eat and merry at your wedding, i will gladly be your guest.


  3. Am not sure I can date my friend ex,its kinda awkward,there can be some moment when we are on it and I’ll be like this guy hands were onces on my friend’s body


  4. My lawd! I’m so with you on this one. Why should i fall in love with my friend’s ex? I mean, there are many other exes of other people. Some people even on a lowkey still drag ex drama into their current relationships. Now imagine that ex drama involving your friend. It’s wrong in all ways. It’s wrong, i repeat, it’s wrong. Say after me, it’s wrong! I haven’t even found that person that could convince me otherwise. Abeg everywhere is hot, let us say it as it is ; exes are a no!


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